My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them. Mitch Hedberg
My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.
One of the dreams on my wish list is to spend more time in Thailand. Kevin Kwan
One of the dreams on my wish list is to spend more time in Thailand.
My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way. Henny Youngman
My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.
I'm so happy because today I found my friends - they're in my head. Kurt Cobain
I'm so happy because today I found my friends - they're in my head.
My music is best understood by children and animals. Igor Stravinsky
My music is best understood by children and animals.
My self healing lies in praying for those who have harmed me. Marianne Williamson
My self healing lies in praying for those who have harmed me.
All my friends are getting married. I guess I’m just at that age where people give up. Amy Schumer
All my friends are getting married. I guess I’m just at that age where people give up.
I don't even listen to rap. My apartment is too nice to listen to rap in. Kanye West
I don't even listen to rap. My apartment is too nice to listen to rap in.
My father grew up in a life of extreme privilege. Kevin Kwan
My father grew up in a life of extreme privilege.
To look and feel my best, I watch my calories and exercise. Kim Kardashian
To look and feel my best, I watch my calories and exercise.
I can assure you that my first and foremost interest is my country. Fidel Castro
I can assure you that my first and foremost interest is my country.
I'm not confident in my own ability to resist the titanic force of my own ego. Garth Risk Hallberg
I'm not confident in my own ability to resist the titanic force of my own ego.
