I'm not interested in closure. Some people just have heart attacks and die, right? There's no closure.

Larry David

I had a wonderful childhood, which is tough because it's hard to adjust to a miserable adulthood.

Larry David

I need to be on drugs to connect with nature.

Larry David

Even back then, I exuded self-confidence, and that drives women crazy.

Larry David

Anyone can be confident with a full head of hair. But a confident bald man - there's your diamond in the rough.

Larry David

Trying on pants is one of the most humiliating things a man can suffer that doesn't involve a woman.

Larry David

I'm a jerk, that's who I am. I'm like everybody else.

Larry David

I'm trying to elevate small-talk to medium talk.

Larry David

People don't yell nasty things at actors - they let them continue.

Larry David

Give a guy a girlfriend and a great job, he doesn’t need therapy.

Larry David

If I wasn't a golfer, I would still be miserable - but not as miserable.

Larry David

Anything that's for free, people will take. They don't discriminate.

Larry David