Stерhеn Tyrone Cоlbеrt (Born Mау 13, 1964) iѕ an Amеriсаn соmеdiаn, tеlеviѕiоn host, аnd аuthоr. Cоlbеrt hаѕ hоѕtеd Thе Lаtе Shоw with Stерhеn Cоlbеrt, a lаtе-night television tаlk show on CBS which i...
Now, I don't see color. People tell me I'm white and I believe them because police officers call me 'sir'. Stephen Colbert
Now, I don't see color. People tell me I'm white and I believe them because police officers call me 'sir'.
Shamelessness is a wonderful part of the character. Stephen Colbert
Shamelessness is a wonderful part of the character.
There's an old saying about those who forget history. I don't remember it, but it's good. Stephen Colbert
There's an old saying about those who forget history. I don't remember it, but it's good.
Contrary to what people may say, there's no upper limit to stupidity. Stephen Colbert
Contrary to what people may say, there's no upper limit to stupidity.
All I can do is today and tomorrow and have some idea of what we're doing next week. That's all I can worry about. Stephen Colbert
All I can do is today and tomorrow and have some idea of what we're doing next week. That's all I can worry about.
If I had a dime for everytime that I was wrong, I'd be broke. Stephen Colbert
If I had a dime for everytime that I was wrong, I'd be broke.
Scientists have invented a new strain of cannabis without the high. They celebrated with non-alcoholic beer and furious dry-humping. Stephen Colbert
Scientists have invented a new strain of cannabis without the high. They celebrated with non-alcoholic beer and furious dry-humping.
I can't prove it, but I can say it. Stephen Colbert
I can't prove it, but I can say it.
Agnostics are just atheists without balls. Stephen Colbert
Agnostics are just atheists without balls.
Global warming isn't real because I was cold today! Also great news: world hunger is over because I just ate. Stephen Colbert
Global warming isn't real because I was cold today! Also great news: world hunger is over because I just ate.
Facts matter not at all. Perception is everything. It's certainty. Stephen Colbert
Facts matter not at all. Perception is everything. It's certainty.
If our Founding Fathers wanted us to care about the rest of the world, they wouldn't have declared their independence from it. Stephen Colbert
If our Founding Fathers wanted us to care about the rest of the world, they wouldn't have declared their independence from it.